approval

pap schrott’s funeral was july 31. my dad, as sick as he was, made the trip to west-pa. i think that, in and of itself, was a heroic feat. he was so sick and so weak and he didn’t have a good relationship with his dad. and yet, he went. and when the rain was pouring down like some hollywood movie, he draped himself in hospital blankets, trudged thru the downpour and sat at the grave site to receive pap’s flag. gosh. what a moment that was. what a man he was. to endure all he did as a child and a young man, all the difficulty and strife and to still show up and respect his father like that. incredible.

i can’t imagine how much he wanted his dad’s approval. there was a conversation going on one day at lgh – i can’t even tell you about what – but i chimed in saying something like “right, dad?” or some-such thing. my dad was sick and dying and probably wasn’t leaving the hospital, but i still wanted his approval and acceptance. i needed his love.

i will make sure my children get that love too.

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Author: thephonewasmadeofjelly

reviving xanga thru wordpress (2002-the present).

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